Getting to know you
Well, I’ve read a lot of techniques, but ultimately, everyone ends up saying, “Every child is different.” It’s the only thing they all get right. Every child *is* different, so it’s about getting to know your child.
Someone mentioned learning about their adopted child’s previous sleep surroundings and mimicing them for comfort. I wish we were able to do this ourselves. Unfortunately, our son slept on the floor with his parents. This just isn’t very feasible for us. Even sleeping in our bed is difficult. One thing we’ve learned is that our son likes to move a lot in his sleep. He rolls all over the place. I actually think this is one of the reasons he wakes up so much since he’s now contained.
So, I’ll start by telling you a little about my son’s preferences with regards to sleep. He is a big fan of being held, moving, bouncing, and patting. Now, these aren’t necessarily “healthy” ways to fall asleep, but they work. So, for a tired parent, I recommend doing whatever keeps you from going crazy. That’s what I do. But, when I’ve got the stamina and the patience, I like to try to minimize how much of this I do.
I started by trying to wear him (as discussed in previous post) without the bouncing. This seemed to go pretty well. I’ve found that the bouncing is really only needed for burping and, lately, he’s been doing better about doing that on his own anyway. Then, I minimized the patting.
Now, as I mentioned, I still do whatever is needed when he’s very fussy or crying. But, I’m figuring that by reducing the amount of external needs, he’ll move closer to being able to self-soothe without having to cry-it-out. I’ve even treid to stop moving as he gets closer to falling asleep to try to encourage him to be ok with being still. That means, he ultimately falls asleep in the carrier or our arms without any other “stimulation.”
And that’s the ultimate goal… to help him learn how to fall asleep all by himself. I’m not sure if we’re getting more sleep these days, but we’re feeling better. It could just be that we’re getting used to the lack of sleep. I like to think that even if he’s not waking up any less, his wake-up sessions are getting smaller and easier. Of course, every day, he gets a little older and, regardless of what I do, there’s a chance he’s just getting more used to our routines, his surroundings and generally improving on his own.
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